Hail Goh Goh!

We are brought up in a society whereby respect is ESTABLISHED and not gained or achieved.

When we are born and when we grow up, we are brought up to call our parents not by their names but a title that will differentiate us from them. Parents now have established this gap; differentiating us from them. We now respect them unconditionally. Same goes for our elders. We call our siblings goh (big brother) and che (big sister); our aunties and uncles now have titles for themselves; our grandparents expect respect, occasionally expecting more respect from us than we give our very own parents.

And their excuse? "It's because we're older."

My answer? "Go die"

If they have not done anything to have suddenly gained this established respect then why give it to them. If they have not shown you any respect, but expect it, you have no reason to respect them.

It is in our cultural roots, being Asian, that we are meant to respect our elders no matter what. We are even brought up in schools to respect elders that we don't even know about. Strangers, imagine. We must respect the old people of our country. For what? They have done nothing for me; did they for you? What makes you think I suddenly need to respect them?

Don't tell me if an old cranky aunty came up to you in the LRT demanding you give up your seat for her you would? She has done NOTHING to gain your respect for you to give up your seat. Furthermore, she DEMANDS it? Ask her to go die.

The same goes for your siblings. If your older brothers and sisters don't respect you, why in the world should you respect them and do what they say? And for you people who call your older siblings goh or che I have a bone to pick with you lot. WHY IN THE WORLD DO YOU DO IT? Why do you insist on creating a gap between you and your siblings. You now see them as being superior, not of the same level. What is the purpose of this title? Go on, answer me this question. I dare you to. Why do you call your older siblings by titles that only differentiate you from them.
You can't answer the question. You have a better chance of solving an add maths question.

I challenge you, a challenge that comes easy for me for I have been brought up this way. First, if you have younger siblings, ask them to stop calling you by a title, tell them that there is no need for this, you have not done anything SO significant as for them to call you by a title that establishes superiority. Next, after you realize there is no need for your younger sibling to call you by a title, you then are ready to stop calling YOUR older sibling a title. Cheng, cheng, cheng. Go on do it. For those who have the courage to break out of this shell our culture has cocooned around us you're doing our culture a favour and your children's culture a favour.

When I have children of my own, I think I'll ask them to call me by my name. A social experiment.

Okay, I lost my steam to continue this rant. Plus, Tenacious D is on now.

So, remember, stop respecting people who never respected you or demand respect from you. And please stop calling your siblings/cousins/aunts/uncles/grandparents/parents (if you dare) by titles that establish them as your superiors. To heck with titles. You still can respect others without them establishing superiority over you. (I'm still working on the parents and grandparents part)

So, message of the day: Screw respect unless it is gained or is mutual.