so heres my story...

OK. srsly. what is happening to you guys?? Have you both decided to take a very dramatic and glamorous disappearance retreat and not tell me about it? Guys, don't i sound ultra distressed and yet, i hear nothing from the two of you?

i'm also hyperventilating at the frequency of a bee's wings right now, which probably is like 5 kazillion flutters per half second. exams are just two days away. did i stress, how much i hate countdowns?? they're soo un-fab, say for eg. the countdown to new years eve- so much dissapointment there! You always expect so much (an episode of Friends is to be blamed for this) and end up getting so little. it's pretty much like sex.

and about my totally O.M.G story. Yes Lisa, i have not mistaken. said homeless man was jacking off in public. it all happened like this. i was rushing home after a taxing day in college, trying my best to run in my extremely heavy sling bag (i swear, fashion is such a drag) and there was this section where this hawker shop was closed or something lame like that. and! there was a man sitting on some rotten piece of wood, eyes closed, muttering to himself. it wasn't until i actually passed by him that i saw the whole of his right hand inside the front of his pants!

i was so O.M.G at this moment. if you know me, you can imagine.

backing up to the story, to put it simply, i saw alot of hand action going on down there. it was as vigorous as Beyonce's bootie when she sang Baby Boy live. i swear on my life. and obvy D he was probably fantasizing about some PlayBoy bunneh or sumfin and muttering to himself - which explains the closed eyes and the mutterings.

some of my coll friends even went to the extent, asking me if i actually saw him come. O.M.F.G majorly??? of course i wasn't gonna stick around to find out if he could fire or not!! i HAD to take advantage of the fact that he didn't see me seeing him (because his eyes were closed) else God only knows what he would have done to me. i radiate alot of sexual aura ok?


ekk! goosebumps right now. thats all for my exclusively traumatizing experience with a man in public. i never thought i lived to see a day where a man was jacking off in front of me. so. not. needed. you see what i mean? life is such a majorly HUGE dissapointment.

xoxo.